When I was 15, I remember that I did not fair too well for two of my subjects for the year end (read D7, F9). In preparation for the following year, I had a teacher who told my mum that she “strongly encourages me to let go of xx subject” so that I could focus better on other subjects and spend more time on the subjects that could get me better grades. Sounded legit.
I thought my mother (as with every other kiasu parent) would heed my teacher’s advise, but instead, she told mrs xx that as a parent, it is her desire to teach her child that life is not always about doing things that will always make us feel good. We may not necessarily come across things we are always good at, and we may not get As in everything but it is through those things that we can learn to work hard, persevere and give it our best. It is through these tough times that we remember we are not that tough after all and have an everlasting hope (okay, she didn’t say this part to my teacher but my mother has definitely taught me that). If, at the end of the day, the results are not the most ideal, it was more important to her that we have learnt through the process, especially learning to have a heart of perseverance and a heart of reliance on the Almighty, the author and perfecter of our faith. (My mum is awesome, I know)
Well, today I really felt like I got an F9 on a situation and I really wanted to just give up and also say “I think it’s better to find something easier”. It was very legit (or at least it sounded very legit in my head) but in this very hard hearted world, my mother can’t speak for me anymore. I needed to remember that we are to consider it pure joy whenever we face trials of many kinds, because I know that the testing of my faith produces perseverance. May perseverance finish its work so that I may be mature and complete, not lacking anything.
And if I lack wisdom, I should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to me. (James, you couldn’t have said it better indeed).
One of my close colleagues mentioned in passing that “you are the perseverant CM” and that really reminded me that this was bigger and more important than just about getting the best piece of work possible. All I need to do is do my best and keep going.
But of course, you know, perhaps things won’t turn out so bad after all. Perhaps, just like the two subjects, I’ll see A2s come my way n realise I’m actually quite alright. And I’ll remember that it was not just by my own effort.
Thank you mum, thank you mrs xx, thank you Jesus.